Road rage rages and simple selfish behaviors spew from behind the wheel of those anonymous, 4000-pound hunks of steel, aluminum and plastic. The American Roadway Experience!
Little needs to be written here to explain the challenges of driving in the Twenty-First Century. From adolescence, we all know the stress and madness, and what it’s like to negotiate those frenetic streets and freeways. But, what might we do about it?
First, let’s explore the anonymity of the vehicle itself. We drive and necessarily do not and cannot examine every face and spirit around us. Instead, we see ourselves surrounded, not by fellow sentients, but by soulless machines, completely dehumanized. This kind of cultivated dehumanization is a prerequisite to violence, going to war and other atrocities. Hand me the keys! What could possibly go wrong?
Plenty.
Thank God for the bumper-sticker meditation: “you are not stuck in traffic; you are traffic”. Like a Recovery Program, this is our first step. Powerless over traffic. Not separate from traffic, just part of the situation. We could abandon the delusion that all other drivers are inferior relative to own superb abilities and relax.
Relaxation could begin at every Red Light. Red Light Buddha. Too often, a Red Light is taken as a personal affront; intentional sabotage of our trip or commute. Instead, imagine it signals, like the meditation bell, pure possibility: Focus on the breath, or maybe a mantra, or how about a favorite prayer. Practice. We know we are making progress when there is a slight disappointment as the light turns green. If struggles remain, don’t fret…there will soon be another Red Light opportunity.
Another form of practice presents itself in gridlock. It is customary to aggress during congestion, fighting for every inch of highway. There is the deep commitment to let no car move in front of us, ever. Instead, try another deep breath and kindly gesture (you know which one) for that nice lady or gentleman to merge in front of you…and smile. Fake it till you make it!
More seriously…Stalls and accidents back up traffic. The EMT unit arrives and passers-by alternate between gawking and cursing the delay. If there is such a thing as negative energy, gawks and curses may be more poisonous than tailpipe emissions. Alternatively, pause to truly see the person in harms way. Imagine it to be someone you love… and love this stranger. Send prayers. May they be free from suffering.
No discussion of traffic would be complete without a review of parking lot customs. Searching for a parking space, seeing one, only to have it stolen before we arrive. Thief! As an experiment, drive slowly through the lot and graciously offer a space that rightfully belongs to you (first dibs). Generosity in the parking lot takes a little effort but like most forms of giving, it bestows grace upon giver and recipient. And on a near full parking lot day, try reversing the plan. Don’t seek the closest space to your destination. Find one far away with easy access. Enjoy a comfortable parking experience followed by a brisk, healthy walk!
And invite Red Light Buddha everywhere and always.
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